what is life without you???

Marriage

2011-03-12T01:10:00.003+08:00

This is a story.

A very lengthy story.

A very meaning lengthy story.

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.
She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.
She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outsidethe door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.
On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.
I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.
Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage.
Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

-look at ur spouse as naked. only then can u see and accept all their flaws-

i miss you

2011-02-07T19:22:00.003+08:00

u made me love cycling the same way u made me love you.

you did it with your heart.

i miss you.

-take care love-

celebrations!!

2011-02-03T00:11:00.003+08:00

Baby! Happy Chinese New Year!
i love you :)

-my sunshine-

bloody backstabbers

2011-01-20T02:27:00.002+08:00

Bloody backstabbers.
They taugh me an extremely important lesson.
Watch your back and keep your friends close and enemies closer.
i learned that you can only be dependant yourself,
because being offered help is a sign of weakness
and accepting it is to fall into your predators hands.
Fuck help.
People dont help you for no reason.
We are all just realistic people.
Help to get something in return ,
else backstab them.
Bloody backstabbers.

Half Way Round the World

2010-11-15T09:10:00.002+08:00

Baby I will soon be leaving
and I know that you are feeling down
But every week I'll send a letter
To let you know my love will never change
I promise you I'll always feel the same

So remember in your heart
Baby when we are apart
There is no need for crying
Cuz even if I am

Halfway 'round the world
That won't stop me from loving you
Halfway 'round the world
I'll Still be feeling the way I do
And now I wanna hold you baby
Cuz I'm gonna miss you like crazy
Even if I'm halfway 'round the world!

Baby when the miles are growing
You and I will still be going strong
No matter what your friends are saying
Don't give up on what you're waiting for
Cuz one day I'll be knocking on your door

So remember in your heart
Baby when we are apart
There's no need for crying
Cuz even if I am

Halfway 'round the world
That won't stop me from loving you
Halfway 'round the world
I'll Still be feeling the way I do
Now I wanna hold you baby
Cuz I'm gonna miss you like crazy
Even if I'm halfway 'round the world!

If I could you know that I would find a way
To stay for good but I must go now
I wanna hold you baby
cuz I'm gonna miss you like crazy even if I'm...

Halfway 'round the world
That won't stop me from loving you
Halfway 'round the world
I'll Still be feeling the way I do
Now I wanna hold you baby
Cuz I'm gonna miss you like crazy
Even if I'm halfway 'round the world!

Halfway 'round the world
That won't stop me from loving you
Halfway 'round the world
I'll Still be feeling the way I do
And now I wanna hold you baby
Cuz I'm gonna miss you like crazy
Even if I'm halfway 'round the world!!

-baby i will wait for u to come home-

My King

2010-11-13T00:29:00.002+08:00

Dear Ryan,

i miss u and i really miss u bad. u are all that i can call mine. Life without you is pretty mundane, almost lifeless. I yearn for your return every hour of the day, every day of the week. i batter the tears and all the shitty feelings just so that i can be your strength and that you can be mine. I wish for you to hurry home cos our children are crying out for your return. My only wish is to see you sooner, even better- Now. But its almost impossible. How i wish i have ways to be there with you but hell there is no way. I want to hold you in my arms again. I want to kiss your lips again. I want to run my fingers through your hair; althought u dont have anymore now. I want to caress my hands along the contours of your face. The face that i miss. The face of my baby. The face of my little darling that i miss so badly. Baby please come home to me. I love you.

Your Princess

rainy day

2010-08-14T19:26:00.002+08:00

everyone is wishing me a happy B*******.
but i am not the least happy.
i dont know why either.
i force myself to sleep in.
even till now i am still on my bed under my blankets.
i dont wanna see anyone, meet anyone.
i dont wanna wake up, or eat anything.
i dont want any wishes, or presents or love.
i guess i am gonna keep it up till the clock stikes 12.

i guess i am just going with the flow and not expecting much. yupp it was good advice. at least it kept me sane. i dont wanna hurt anyone so staying home and asleep is a good solution right. saves money, saves time. No hard feelings or awkward moments.just me in my own room, under my own blanket, on my own pillow. and plus its raining now so staying home would mean no one gets wet. perfect.

goodbye world for today.

School!

2010-08-03T02:00:00.008+08:00

yes. this is my art piece. finally! hahaa...this also marks the last week of school which makes me super ultra happy. While we were setting up our art pieces, the room got so comfy that LEBM was done there too and we only left like at 8.40pm. Sorry Miss Jean! she had to wait for us to lock up >.< and to end such an awesome day, decided to head dowwn to bugis to fetch baby from work. surprise not?! hahahaa. and awesome dinner!
ok promise sarah i will blog cos we completed so much work today and finally feel so accomplished after this whole sem of crazy assignment schedules and super early morning lessons. Shall turn in now for a a new day of SSEE and CRC tmr later! nights!

ok promise sarah i will blog cos we completed so much work today and finally feel so accomplished after this whole sem of crazy assignment schedules and super early morning lessons. Shall turn in now for a a new day of SSEE and CRC ~~tmr~~ later!
nights!

-feelin' so good-

Sunflower

2010-07-21T12:44:00.002+08:00

Sunflower.

Many Sunflower.

Many many Sunflower.

I love the Sunflower.

I love a Sunflower.

I love a Sunflower at someone's house.

Happy 5th Monthsary Baby :)

-i love special days-

Bleah!

2010-07-13T00:51:00.002+08:00

ok. its been a super long time since i blog randomly. Like out of the blue, when there is nothing i wanna say , yet something i wanna say kinda feeling. Hahaha, i kinda like it. Hmm, today or should i say yesterday, was rather dreadful. Mr E died on me after not seeing him for 3 days. Apparently my dumb lil bro tried playing with it and my dad stopped him and Mr E kinda was involved in some kinda violence. Seeing the E.Doc tmr. Hahaha, i love the cool names :) yeah, damn sian and all this happen only after i stick my PRINCESS sticker on it. Rahhhh! what happens if it requires some repaire and sticker gets spoilt or discarded? I WILL BE SO DEPRESSED, and i am not kidding. Cos its like super EXPENSIVE and RARE. Rahhh, i hope it doesnt happen!

Ogay, damn bored now. i wanna slept but like cant fall asleep cos Baby hasnt called me back neither has he answered my calls. Not gonna wait up so long so gonna head to the bed soon. Hahaha, just a lil digression... ikinda like how this blog post is going :) This week is gonna be so enjoyable for me cos there is no assignment submissions for me EXCEPT presentation on Wednesday and i have already done my slides *yays*. So can slack slack abit. ok 'rolls eyes' like as if i have not been slacking enough.

Oh yah! i need to think of one super ultra awesome and amzing art piece to create and another super ultra interesting science experiment. and that should sum up the last of my assignments for this sem. then all thats left is EXAMS :( for the 2 modules that i have missed the most classes. Yah, i know, this time round strategy is like totally wrong and screwed so i shall TRY(key word!) to be a good girl for the rest of the sem by trying to attend as many classes as i can for now.

hahahha. ok i have run out of topics to talk abt already. Hmm, yay baby is outta the bathe and i gonna call him le. so ciaos for now!

-is this considered annoying? *makes sounds*-

I love you :)

2010-07-11T20:13:00.004+08:00

It's been an awesome 2 days with baby. Yesterday was precious time spent at the airport. Ate hong kong cafe. Food was just okay but company was THE LOVE <3>

Pretty stickers from Paper Market :)

Baby bought them for me!

Today Is spent at queensway and ikea. Saw an awesome pair of high cut shoes. Got poison but it is super awesome can. Price also not very expensive. Sponsors anyone? Haha. plus It pink! Ok and walk walk at ikea is so fun. Can see Many many things and do lotsa family planning. I like (y)!

BTW mummy gave me $$$ to buy the shoes already! gonna get them on tuesday :)

-only love-

Yum Yum

2010-07-03T12:01:00.003+08:00

isnt this the prettiest chawanmushi in the world?

Baby i love you :)

Btw this was when we went to sakae sushi to eat!

-baby i want waraku-

My love

2010-07-02T18:54:00.004+08:00

Ok....Major Apologies! Been a long time since i have updated. 4th Month just passed :)

Baby looking so cute as usual!

Baby treat me SUSHI TEI! hahahha. i had to "sa jiao" alot ok! hahahah

Not forgeting buffet at sakae sushi :)

Happy with our dearest kids! Omg they are so fat now. totally resemble furballs!

Baby i love you!

like finally

2010-05-21T00:53:00.003+08:00

HAPPY 3RD MONTHSARY

HAPPY GRADUATION

BABY :)

i love you,

my dearest.

damn me

2010-04-19T23:36:00.001+08:00

baby,

i never say i dont want you,
and i will never say it in future too.

Unless you dont want me,
than that will be another story.

All that happened,
was solely my fault,
you are not to blame.

Cos i am being such a bitch,
while you are just a ~~dame~~.

Being angry with mummy and daddy,
has nothing to do with you.

So i hope thropught this little poem,
i can say sorry to you.

p.s my mum took away THE bag again. damn

-my one and only-

Day 1

2010-04-10T21:27:00.002+08:00

Dear Baby,

Day one in hongkong has just passed. arrived and settled in the hotel. hotel is disappointingly small. Went for lunch and had hainaness chicken and flatten rice noodle soup. Not bad but chicken is different from singapore. Then went back to hotel for a rest before heading out. i took the MTR (aka MRT to singaporeans). We went ~~window~~ shopping. Saw many nice stuff but prices are not that cheap so didnt buy anything. I ate some cold noodles thingy from the streets which is damn nice! den continued walking along the streets and i ate SMELLY Toufu. Hahaha. Quite nice lah. Den was slowly becoming moody cos mummy and daddy are not paying attention to what i want to buy. Den ate dinner at some super nice roast meat place. Had roast duck, goose, pork, chicken and pigeon. Continued walking and still super moody. Walk until i saw this street stall selling belts. though of you immediately and saw one which i like (i hope you will like it too). I asked for price and bargain den successfully bargained but i got no money so ask daddy for money den he black face but i just take and pay. hahaha. thats the only thing i bought for today. still moody moody now. how i wish u here with me. i wanna hold you baby. i dunno how i even managed to survived today without you. Baby, gonna end here now but i will be waiting up for u to come online okies. I Love You.

Love,
Gracia

WTH

2010-04-03T13:57:00.002+08:00

Worst girlfren on earth? Me.

Why? I always make Baby worried about me.

How? I cry and not talk and stare into blank space when he talks.

When? All the time when my mood swings.

Why is it so hard for me to contol my emotions. Why am i so sensitive? Now its difficult for Baby to tell me what he thinks so as not to stress me. Why do i cause so much misery to my little darling? Baby i love you. I really do.

-kiss me, hold me tight-

it's all my fault

2010-04-01T23:34:00.000+08:00

i cant smile like in this picture anymore. Why is it that all i do is to make baby worried and upset about me. i cant even make baby feel secure that i will always be by his side. What the fuck is wrong with me. Just as i am insecure, he must feel much more worst. All i do is cry and make baby guilty. I am really bad at all this shit. sometimes i wonder why i am given such a good boyfriend when i am just a nobody. there is definetly someone out there that loves baby more but he still choose me. i dont know if i deserve all this. baby is giving his best yet i am still being a spoilt princess. Really pissed with myself for being the barrier between us. Why cant i just listen to him. Everything baby does is for my own good yet i still disagree with him. Even if i dont disagree, my expression tells the world that i am unhappy. Why is it so hard to take in baby's advice. Why do i still want things my way when i know i am in the wrong? Why do i have to be so stubborn? Why am i not someone else who is nicer? Why? Why?Why?

-tell me why-

What is life without Love

2010-03-31T15:28:00.002+08:00

Baby and i. We went to SPCA!

This is Maple. Damn handsome golden retriever. Baby likes her too!

This is Triffin, very shy but nice Labrador. He only likes girls so baby couldnt get his attention.

Hahaha! conclusion is that baby likes Maple more. i like them both!

One day we are gonna have our own dog and that will be our family!

We decided to settle for hamsters as children for now. Say hello to Maple and Triffin, yes i know! we named them after the dogs! super cute when they are lazing around. and baby is so fatherly towards our kids >.<

The home we built for them. Nice?!

Stretching lazily on the wheel. Dame cute!

Haha! shirts i got for baby as a surprise. Baby didnt even know i got it for him. Bright colors for my handsome boy!

Tadah! and we got matching 4Skin slippers cos baby know i wanted it badly and baby needed better slippers!

My handsome chef in the making!

Baby i love you!

and i ~~was~~ am not jealous of ham ham ok!

-1 in a zillion-

loved

2010-03-20T02:04:00.001+08:00

Baby! HAPPY FIRST MONTHSARY!

I Love you!

-my everything-

tell me

2010-03-18T00:35:00.003+08:00

i don't know how i should be feeling right now. so many things have been trying to come between us. that accounts for the external factors. internally, we both have bad habits to work on. i guess to keep it up, we really have to be more understanding and tolerating. not gonna let go cos baby loves me so much. i didnt know that i could actually be so nice and understanding. i guess my patience level is building up. yet then again i can be as unreasonable as a spoilt princess. its irritating how different character works in me. i really wanna try my hardest, give this my best and make sure it last. i know this is what baby wants too. glad that both of our parents are approving of each other. at least its a small faith that keeps us going. something we can hold onto.

"Baby, sorry for being so mean and physically irritate you all the time. i know its painful! Baby i love you. Don't be stressed out by the parent-money problem ok. take things slow and we will conquer the tough times like how i ~~half~~ conquered punggol end ok :) "

-two is better than one-

My walk with you!

2010-03-12T00:39:00.003+08:00

Orange day for us and we got our 4skins Bag.
Pink for me and red for Love.

Checkered day!

OCBC! Doing events with Love was great.
My beloved sai kang warrior!

Our ring! Rose gold. Simple the best. Thank you Moshi Moshi :)

Enjoying the sea breeze.

Baby's house for lunch den cycled to Pasir Ris Park for chill out session.
My boy boy is super cute with his "monster" face.

making things sweeter with dessert.
uber good desserts so try it if you can.
you wont be disappointed!

I wish that we would always have our hands held tightly onto each other.
Letting you go would be something i wish i will never need to do.
Baby you are my one and only one.
I love you.

That's my cutie pie for you!

-i will never let you go-

pitifully lame

2010-03-11T00:59:00.002+08:00

Dear anon,

i really don't feel that its worthy of my time entertaining you but it just happen that i have some spare time while my boyfriend is taking his bath. didnt wanna write this post but if ryan and i being too lovely actually bothers you, then i can only apologise and watch you be envy. Hmm, didnt see a need to password this blog cos its gonna be filled with lotsa love from ryan and the world should know about it. Your comments dont seem meaningful enough to remain on my tagboard thus i just bid them goodbye. you can continue trying which i believe you will but i hope it occurs to you that i can control what i wanna see on my blog and what i don't. i suggest you stop wasting your time but if you really feel that i am of such great importance and it makes such a great impact in your life that it actually affects you and makes you feel uneasy then let me know and i can personally let you in to my life and show you more about how things work for me and people around me.

Cheers!

One Love

2010-03-03T01:00:00.002+08:00

Baby. Thank you for weathering the storms with me. We have done so many stuff togther including stupid and funny things. i am falling more for you and i wanna walk this journey with you. i want you to know that i really appreaciate everything that you do for me and all the effort you take just to see a smile on my face. i guess i cant help it that some people are jealous that you have such as smart and pretty girlfriend. i wanna see us go far in life and even further in our relationship. for my love for you is so strong like super glue. i love you!

-kiss me through the phone-

How Pitiful.

2010-03-02T00:43:00.000+08:00

Bad day at work. Loads of cork up here and there. Well, it sucks when there are so many people in action and so many instructions to take. It reaches a point of time when you are receiving 3 different orders at the same time and you are required to perform all 3 at the same time too. tell me how possible that it. and you want things to be subtle yet you say that people are not doing their things. Come on. Just because your eyes don't see people working does not mean they are slacking their ass off. What about making these particular group of crew get food and drinks for everyone and then they are being told of for moving away from their area? it seems almost impossible for one to stay stationary at the point and yet transport food right! Hmm...you might wanna consider teleport. And bloody long hours without proper dinner. tell me about it.

As for hijacking my guys, i am not gonna say much. but, damn you bloody asshole. the least you could do is inform me and find a replacement. now who is gonna compensate me for my oppurtunity cost? and you are so damn afraid that you resort to telling the whole damn world about it, making people take pity on you. these simply shows how weak you are and you cant even stand up for urself. what makes you think or gives you the slightest idea that they can help salvage the situation. come on. dont be dumb, use some brains for once. and for all the shit work that you make my guys do and you simply running away from it, you are gonna pay the price of our friendship. whats friendship to me? come on, its a business world out there.

words cant describe my anger. this is a learning lesson for me to make things clearer before embarking on the work. thank you for teaching me this lesson.

-dont fuck around with me cos i will fuck you back-

My baby

2010-02-28T23:08:00.002+08:00

Tears of falling deeper in love is just like tears of joy. Was on my way home just now with baby when i just stared into his eyes and tears just started to well up in my eyes. today was rather enjoyable. however even thought we were so near each other, it seemed so far too. there was like a sense of detachment. liked we seem so far apart. there was not much personal time for us. it kinda hit me that i might be loosing him but i was really thinking too much cos i know he wouldnt. on top of that, his frustrations added on to my heavy heart and i guess that was what allowed the tears to become so heavy that it rolled down my cheeks. bad timing and didnt manage to get our bags as planned. double sadness. i guess i am starting to get emotionally attached. maybe this is the right path. maybe this was what i have been looking for. maybe he is the one for me.

It hit me harder when i got home just to find out that baby cant stay over. den tears starts to flow again. heart sinks deeper. told baby and heard his disappointment. maybe i am not a good girlfren after all. why are there so many obstacles between us. i cant go on anymore. the tears are too much for me to handle. i just want to love you.

Baby i love you.

-rain and tears, all the same-

DearDear & Me

2010-02-26T00:47:00.002+08:00

Tuesday: Sentosa + Resort World + Vivo + Yogurt

Burnt like mad but its worth the while :)

Wedneday: Attachment + Makan Place + Imm

Simple dinner with lots of sweet nothings!

Thursday: Attachment + B came to fetch me + Work meeting + Duck rice + MOS burger milk tea+ window shopping

I like just being by your side. With you i can walk forever no matter how far :)

i foresee that friday, saturday and sunday is gonna be so happening. things are piling up. but i am glad i am doing it with YOU cos it makes me happier.

-you are my stength when i am weak-

Loved.

2010-02-23T00:43:00.003+08:00

Dear Ryan,

thank you for coming into my life. i know it was not an easy start for us. You went through quite alot before i decided to meet up with you. I was quite sure i would be single if not for you my dear. I really appreciate your efforts in coming to look for me and pick me up no matter where i am. I really wanna have a standing ovation towards how you can put up with me having other flings before we were together. I knew you didnt like it but i still tell you about them. I know i tell you that i am not used to being in a relationship but looking at how much faith you have in me, i dare not let you down cos your love for me is so strong. i am so glad you get along well with my friends cos they are what makes me. i hope your love for me will never change and i will love you more and more each day. I promise.

-because you love me-

baby love

2010-02-22T00:34:00.000+08:00

end of exams + ring hunt + sushi + steamboat + tom's palette = AWESOME

AWESOME + cute boy ryan = THE LOVE

there u have it.

all in a simple equation.

sentosa tmr!

-baby dont worry, you are my only-

dear dear

2010-02-21T01:41:00.002+08:00

haha...after so long i guess its time to settle down.
say hi to Ryan everyone.
kinda surprising and shocked but it all happened under the fireworks.
we just so happened to be at the right place and at the right time.

one more paper to go.
all the best Gracia.

-you saw the best there was in me-

Fun

2010-02-14T21:33:00.003+08:00

sit back relax and enjoy the fun.
its chinese new year cum valentines.

joke of the day:

boy: i wanted to hug you just now.
girl: why didnt you? i wanted to kiss you.
boy: lol! why didnt you.

omg so cute!

-i got a feeling tonight gonna be a good night-

Where'd you go?

2010-02-09T23:09:00.002+08:00

Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone.

Where'd you go?
I miss you so,
Seems like it's been forever,
That you've been gone,
Please come back home...

-its been many hours-

Sweet

2010-02-08T17:36:00.003+08:00

Had lunch with dear again :)

dirtraction yesterday.
awesome experience.
lots of fun and friends.
definetly going back.
might even start biking myself.
we'll see how!

-power of love-

DIVA!

2010-02-06T21:19:00.002+08:00

I think i am DAMN AWESOME.
I think main comm is DAMN AWESOME.
I think alumni is DAMN AWESOME.
I think hi! club is DAMN AWESOME.

~~i think baby is so awesome~~

i never though our performance was that jaw dropping but i am glad it was! i guess its something new and rather weird but we gave it a go, we gave it our best and we did it. Awesome job done ! I am so glad our last official main comm performance was such a blast. We always wanted to leave with a bang and we did it. I am seriously so in love with main comm. Cos we brought sexy back *winks*

-you make me wanna love-

where is it going?

2010-01-31T16:21:00.002+08:00

lost and forlorn.
left alone again.
~~peace & serenity~~

what's there to be looking forward to now?
everything is nothing but lies and empty promises.

-i'm craving for you-

the big 19

2010-01-26T21:30:00.001+08:00

Booya! its your big day so...

HAPPY! BIRTHDAY NA'IIMAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

its one post with green font specially for you ok(oh and the adidas pic).

-keep smiling-

relieved.

2010-01-26T16:26:00.002+08:00

i am relieved.
thanks for calling.
thanks for talking.
thanks for reassuring me.
i guess i will wait.
i guess its time i stop living life frivolously.
i guess i ~~kinda~~ know what i want.
6 months wont be very long.
just a couple of events and its gonna blow over.
in a blink of an eye a new beginning.
I am ready.

-because you love me-

male female emo

2010-01-25T14:47:00.002+08:00

i am in the last stage.
there is so much going through my mind.
sometimes i wish we could sit down and have a talk.
but there is hardly ever a chance for that.
cos you are so busy.
your priorities does not keep me in the of the top list.
i thought last night we could sort some things out.
i guess tennis was more important.
so much for telling me that its gonna be "ME" time.
you didnt even bother to tell me your class was cancelled.
i was really concerned and worried.

-please, show me how you want it to be-

2010-01-25T00:38:00.001+08:00

LEO- THE SEX MANIAC(7/23-8/22)

Very talkative, outgoing and popular. Nice to everyone they meet. Wild and ravenous in the bed and everywhere else. Beautiful smile and personality. Strong intuition. Their Love is one of a kind. Silly, Fun and SEXY. Have own unique appeal. Irresistible lover. Most caring person you’ll ever meet! However not the kind of person you wanna mess with…they will kick your ass… u might end up crying…

PISCES - THE SEX ADDICT(2/19-3/20)

EXTREMELY adorable. Intelligent. Loves to joke. Very Good sense of humor. Energetic. Predict future. BEST kisser. Always get what they want. Very Attractive. Easy going. RARE Find. GOOD when found. Loves being in long relationship.

Seems like its a good match :)

too bad

2010-01-24T10:31:00.002+08:00

well. indeed a picture says it all.
it tells a thousand words.
it tells a million feelings.
its simple.

"Take one step at a time
There's no need to rush
It's like learning to fly
Or falling in love
It's gonna happen and it's
Supposed to happen and we
Find the reasons why
One step at a time"

i guess i am moving too quickly for you.
i guess taking a step back wouldn't be that bad.
i guess less is more now.

ps. i am on tumblr too! graciastalking.tumblr.com

-hey, why you look so sad-

Bad Romance

2010-01-22T02:03:00.003+08:00

Bad Romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!

Oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh!

Caught in a bad romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!

Oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh!

Caught in a bad romance

Rah rah ah-ah-ah!

Ro mah ro-mah-mah

Gaga Ooh-la-la!

Want your bad romance

Rah rah ah-ah-ah!

Ro mah ro-mah-mah

Gaga Ooh-la-la!

Want your bad romance

I want your ugly

I want your disease

I want your everything

As long as it’s free

I want your love

Love-love-love

I want your love

I want your drama

The touch of your hand

I want you leathee-studded kiss in the sand

I want your love

Love-love-love

I want your love

Love-love-love

I want your love

You know that I want you

And you know that I need you

I want it bad

Your bad romance

I want your loving

And I want your revenge

You and me could write a bad romance

(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!)

I want your loving

All your love is revenge

You and me could write a bad romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!

Oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh!

Caught in a bad romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!

Oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh!

Caught in a bad romance

Rah rah ah-ah-ah!

Ro mah ro-mah-mah

Gaga Ooh-la-la!

Want your bad romance

I want your horror

I want your design

‘Cause you’re a criminal

As long as your mine

I want your love

Love-love-love

I want your love, uhh

I want your psycho

Your vertigo stick

Want you in my room

When your baby is sick

I want your love

Love-love-love

I want your love

Love-love-love

I want your love

You know that I want you

And you know that I need you

I want it bad

Your bad romance

I want your loving

And I want your revenge

You and me could write a bad romance

(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!)

I want your loving

All your love is revenge

You and me could write a bad romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!

Oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh!

Caught in a bad romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!

Oh-oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh-oh!

Caught in a bad romance

Rah rah ah-ah-ah!

Ro mah ro-mah-mah

Gaga Ooh-la-la!

Want your bad romance

Work-work fashion baby

Work it move that bitch crazy

Work-work fashion baby

Work it move that bitch crazy

Work-work fashion baby

Work it move that bitch crazy

Work-work fashion baby

Work it

I’m a freak bitch baby

I want your love

And I want your revenge

I want your love

I don’t wanna be friends

I don't wanna be friends

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!

(I don't wanna be friends)

Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!

Caught in a bad romance

(I don't wanna be friends)

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!

Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!

(Want your bad romance)

Caught in a bad romance

(Want your bad romance)

I want your loving

I want your revenge

You and me could write a bad romance

(Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!)

I want your loving

All your love is revenge

You and me could write a bad romance

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!

(Want your bad romance)

Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!

Caught in a bad romance

(Want your bad romance)

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oooh!

(Want your bad romance)

Oh-oh-oooh-oh-oh!

Caught in a bad romance

Rah rah ah-ah-ah!

Ro mah ro-mah-mah

Gaga Ooh-la-la!

Want your bad romance

Just when i thought i saw light at the end of a tunnel,

It turns out to just be a reflection of my buttons.

I guess there is still a long way before the light really appears.

Just when i thought i saw a silloutte at the end of the road,

It turns out to be just a scarecrow.

Once more i am left alone on the journey.

It is really so difficult?

As long as everyone plays a part.

Who can say it's not gonna work out.

-i wonder how, i wonder why-

Accidentally in love

2010-01-21T09:38:00.002+08:00

Love is unconditional,
Love is forgiving,
Love is giving,
and never taking.

Love has no jealousy,
Love has no anger,
Love is about happinese,
For you and your partner.

It is good to know,
It is good to tell,
But even if there are secrets,
Doubt nothing about it.

Well. This is true love to me. As long as i keep to these, i don't see why He wont appreciate me. This are virtues that not many people have. But it's natural in me and its lucky to have.

-everytime you touch i get this feeling-

baby <3

2010-01-19T00:48:00.003+08:00

i like the way you call me baby.

i like the way you kiss me on my forehead.

i like the way you hold my hands.

i like the way you wrap yourself around me.

i like the way you look at me-straight into my eyes.

i like the way you whisper sweet nothings into my ear.

i like the way you place your hands on me.

i like the way you talk.

i like the way you speak so shy-ly and so cute all the time.

i like the way you carry me.

i like the way you ask if i am alright.

i like the way you bought water for me even thought i said i don't need.

i like the way you touch my ankle.

i like the way you plant your love bites on me.

i like the way you look so good in pictures.

Most importantly I Love You <3

-want you to be the one and only-

in love again.

2010-01-18T13:28:00.001+08:00

basking in love. Hopefully all goes well :)
who says i cant find true love in a club >.<

-leather studded kiss in the sand-

i don't want!!!

2010-01-16T14:04:00.003+08:00

this is so true. and i am still doing it and not gonna start work anytime soon.
super nua now. clubbed and danced for 3 days in a row, plus attachment which is so damn early and i am damn short of sleep.
guess i really need some kinda motivation like love, or ice-cream or something.
hahha

-i wanna love you, love you-

Feelings

2010-01-12T02:16:00.004+08:00

"just like a picture, my heart speaks a thousand words. It's whether you can read it or not." -anonymous-

-love, love love, i want your love-

The New Year

2010-01-10T20:52:00.002+08:00

Its the festive season and i started the year with a bad post.

But whatever it is, i have been enjoying myself ever since like christmas.

Clubbing and partying till the morning and more clubbing and partying.

Catching up with many friends and really enjoying life.

Though assignments are piling up, i am clearing them so nothing to fret about.

Hi! Club's gonna come to an end so Yippee!!!

Exams are coming which marks the start of holidays.

Oh! and SCSM gatherings + Appreciation dinner.

Ok. This year apparently isnt that bad so far and so i am gonna make it good for the year.

oh.... and i wanna wear a sexy highcut cheongsam/qipao for CNY please!

-i want your leather-studded kiss in the sand-

What ever will be will be

2010-01-06T11:36:00.003+08:00

Seriously, it is utterly disgusting to not honour your words. When you mentioned that you will do it and reassured us that you have submitted it, we gave you the benefit of doubt and fucking trusted you. However, all i see now on our results is " Not submitted" and a D grade. This is nothing to be proud off. You brought us down from a B grade to a D grade. What the fuck are you. If you wish to skive and lead a stress-free life, get the fuck out of this course. School is not about yourself. It concerns the people around you especially your groupmates and classmates. Its really fine with me if only your grades are affected. I seriously wont give a shit to whether you submit your individual assignments or not. But when its a blooody group work, you jolly well work your ass off and earn the grade. Apparently you do not even deserve the D grade for this project now. It has been countless number if times that you have missed project meetings and all you do is volunteer to present. Like, hello!!! presentation is the most simple task, it doesnt even require brains. Seriously, just by presenting does not give you the mark for full participation. Many atimes we have wanted to leave you out of the project due to your excuses. Our group is made up of ppl with gpa of 3 and above and there you are with 2.8(i think?? maybe worst). If you are gonna try and pull us down to be like you, SORRY, thats not gonna happen cos at the end of the day, we stand by each other and also the matter will be brought to a higher level. You can jolly well get debarred or fail the course. Apparently i do hope that happens in the near future so that no one else from our class suffers and we can all do well together. And also the future generation does not have to suffer from a teacher like you. I seriously don't see any future for you so might as well consider quitting school. The sooner you do it the better. At least no one has to go throught the pain with you and your dont have to feel so depressed about people not being on talking terms with you. No matter how you gonna defend yourself, i would advice that you save the time and get back on track if you dont wanna quit school. Cos, no matter what happens, i am gonna maitain my GPA of 3.5 or even improve it and apply for my scholarship this semester. So, fuck off and die Bitch.

-i'm ready for your entertainment-

Our Hands

2009-12-30T10:59:00.002+08:00

The wonders of our hands.
Hands are so important.
No matter how big or how small our hand is,
it can play a part.
Small hands can be used for the eyes or ears.
Big hands can be use for the nose or tongue.
How big or how small doesnt really matter.
It is how important you see it as.

If you think you can, you REALLy can!

-believe in yourself, you rock!-

2009-12-29T00:10:00.003+08:00

Over You

Now that it's all said and done,

I can't believe you were the one

To build me up and tear me down,

Like an old abandoned house.

What you said when you left

Just left me cold and out of breath.

I fell too far, was in way too deep.

Guess I let you get the best of me.

Well, I never saw it coming.

I should've started running

A long, long time ago.

And I never thought I'd doubt you,

I'm better off without you

More than you, more than you know.

I'm slowly getting closure.

I guess it's really over.

I'm finally getting better.

And now I'm picking up the pieces.

I'm spending all of these years

Putting my heart back together.

'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,

I got over you.

You took a hammer to these walls,

Dragged the memories down the hall,

Packed your bags and walked away.

There was nothing I could say.

And when you slammed the front door shut,

A lot of others opened up,

So did my eyes so I could see

That you never were the best for me.

Well, I never saw it coming.

I should've started running

A long, long time ago.

And I never thought I'd doubt you,

I'm better off without you

More than you, more than you know.

I'm slowly getting closure.

I guess it's really over.

I'm finally getting better.

And now I'm picking up the pieces.

I'm spending all of these years

Putting my heart back together.

'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,

I got over you.

Well, I never saw it coming.

I should've started running

A long, long time ago.

And I never thought I'd doubt you,

I'm better off without you

More than you, more than you know.

Well, I never saw it coming.

I should've started running

A long, long time ago.

And I never thought I'd doubt you,

I'm better off without you

More than you, more than you know.

I'm slowly getting closure.

I guess it's really over.

I'm finally getting better.

And now I'm picking up the pieces.

I'm spending all of these years

Putting my heart back together.

Well I'm putting my heart back together,

'Cause I got over you.

Well I got over you.

I got over you.

'Cause the day I thought I'd never get through,

I got over you.

Yupp, watever. My heart is open for others agin. Not that it was ever closed. Well, its officially over. I am officially ditching you. Cheerios!

-your freedom is in your own hands-

happy holidays =)

2009-12-25T00:18:00.002+08:00

Merry Christams! Holidays are all so packed.

25th Dec Christmas family lunch/dinner

26th Dec Buying food for Hi! Club BBQ

27th Dec Hi! Club BBQ

28th Dec TETL Submission/Attachment Lead-in

29th Dec Attachment Lead-in + SJAB'06 Comm Outing

30th Dec Hi! Club Sub-Comm Stuff + Ladies Night

31st Dec NPRCHN 5th Exco Committee Meeting

-where'd you go, i missed you so-

its the in thing!!!

2009-12-16T23:49:00.002+08:00

This crazy bunch of people are the HIGHLIGHTS of my life now. After SCSM'09, we were all suffering from severe withdrawal syndromes and it was so bad we had an outing to seoul garden and following that was 2 leaders debrief one day after another and i can foresee more outings to come. Everyone is missing each other that we still keep in contact on a like almost daily basis be it via phone, msn, facebook or even seeing each other face to face.

This is what a successful event should be like. Bonds and friendships should be forged, probably to the extent of find your life partners(as quoted from uncle jaymes). No doubt i had a smashing SCSM last year but this year is ABSOLUTELY FATABULOUS and we all have met out match and our life long friends and even an avenue for money to be earned together for everyone(right mez?!) We even work so well that our minds are tuned to the right frequency most of the time and our virtual internets are always connected.I have to compliment this wonderful bunch of weirdos and there is so much more for me to go on and on about them.

I just wanna shout out to the world and tell everyone how fun events can be. If your were thinking " shit, not another boring event" then i shall prove you wrong. If you set your mindset that way, then you are gonna miss out on loads of fun.Well if you have done events and still find it boring, thats simply because you havent found US! With 2009 coming to an end, it simply means 2010 is arriving and that shouts, "MORE EVENTS." SO what are you waiting for? Tag me, email me or even call me!!! You will have some fun coming your way =)

haha...sounds exciting yea. hahaha..well i have been resting for the past week and its a good sign. leaders debrief went extremely well and i am so proud of myself. i just had to say those "heart-warming" words and just nice it was used to close the session. i hope that did wake some ppl up from their don't care less attitude. damn those leaders. hahaha. Bang! Yea, i shot them down! Alrights i shall be ending here. time for more rest and to welcome Christmas =)

-its a new dawn, its a new day, its a new life-

Your story My story Our story

2009-12-12T21:59:00.004+08:00

Our Love Our Story

We were strangers starting out on our journey. Never dreaming what we'd have to go through. Now here we are and I'm suddenly standing. At the beginning with you. No one told me I was going to find you. Unexpected what you did to my heart. When I lost hope you were there to remind me. This is the start

If you could see that I'm the one who understands you. Been here all along, so why can't you see? You belong with me. Standing by and waiting at your back door. All this time how could you not know? Baby, you belong with me, you belong with me You belong with me. Have you ever thought just maybe. You belong with me? You belong with me.

Straight through my heart, A single bullet got me I can't stop the bleeding. Straight through my heart, She aimed, and she shot me. I just can't believe it. No I can't resist, and I can't be hit. I just can't escape this love. Straight through my heart.

This has been how our journey is like. It gets darker and darker, deeper and deeper. How is it gonna end? I wonder. Sometimes i ask myself why wasn't i the one who met you 7 months ago. Sometimes i blame myself for even putting you in this situation. No matter what, I will love you for as long as i can.

-show me how you want it to be-

My Baby Love

2009-12-09T09:25:00.003+08:00

Atiq B. Thanx for sending me home. It was one of the most peaceful moments we had. Although we did not really talk much, just holding your hand and having you by my side was good enough. The last few days was like a little dream that was so sweet i would never want to wake up from. I like it when you covered me with your jacket. I like the way you call me "B". I like it when you feed me and hold my hands and give me encouragemets. I now ahve to face reality and what i have done is wrong and i should be returning you to your Baby Love. I just want you to know that I really enjoyed your company for the last few days and you will always be etched in my heart. We only shared a kissed (which kinda came as a surprise for you) and that was all i ever got from you. You have shown me your faithfulness to your Baby Love. As much as i have tried time and again, i was not successful. Well done B. Going back to the day when you sent me home, i wanted to do more but i just had to remain as that as i did not want to be disappointed. These days we still have been in close contact and i really appreciate that you still have a part of your heart for me. I wish that you will have a strong relationship with your Baby Love and that no one shall come between you guys. One last word. I really like it when you give me morning calls. Waking up to your voice is more that i can ask for. With this, I LOVE YOU.

Loves Gracia.

-why is it so hard to let go? looking forward to friday!-

Post Event Activities

2009-12-07T23:48:00.005+08:00

Helpdesk. In charge of the missing chips and the difficult customers.

Manager. Being the rabbit and cleaning up all the shit.

Race Day Volunteer Welfare. Controlling the masses. Being the bad guy along side Mez.

Say Hi! to Omar's son. Baby bear with Wormy.

New shoes. Old shoes gonna die. yays

Bright shoes. Love it to the max!

A little reward to myself. Pink again. The loves.

-well done. good job. pats on back-

work work work

2009-11-22T13:00:00.002+08:00

Busy working these days. The only agenda- Stand Chart. Though work is taxing and all, my position, i like it =)

Managed to do some e-learning. i hope i dont screw myself for e-learning.

Heading to Singapore Expo for Food Fair later. Yays.

-its been 60 hours-

dream dream dream

2009-11-17T00:30:00.002+08:00

i was supposed to blog yesterday but while the picture was uploading, my internet got cut off so yea. no mood to blog after that cos after gazzillion times of trying to restart the internet i gave up and watched tv for the rest of the night.

ok, i wanted to blog abt my dreams but apparently i dont really have the feel already so hhahaha too bad. Anyway those who should know already know so there isnt really a need to blog about. ok, just a small gist. i dreamt about mr.I and hi!club ppl and also i dreamt abt ms.W. Got the military "i wanna be in the army" feel again. Wahhaha.thats all i am gonna reveal.

well, scoopes for today =) 2nd lesson and my class 1C has already learnt the whole song except for 2 lines which are damn easy. really proud of them. Wahahaha. Oh yes! and i did well for my oral assesment =) apparently "i brought the passage to life" as mentioned by my tutor so yays.

Oh. and my funny random friend asked me if i wanted to be the vp of nprchn. whahaha. i said anything so we'll see how it goes.

thats all for now. e-learning this week and other time has been sold to SCSM so stay tune for more updates!

-without you its hard to survive-

Movies on Demand

2009-11-12T12:44:00.003+08:00

3 movies in a week. cool or wat =)

yippies. schools good cos next week is e-learning and i should be ready and all geared up for SCSM! double yays.

Hi! Clubs been good. students are so hyper. Don must jiayou and try to connect more with the class k. Be more heard yea =)

Take care and jia you for ur studies hor! Dun give up yea. U know who u are!!!

-superhero, please take me with you-

shopping

2009-11-08T00:14:00.003+08:00

i went shopping today after refreshers course and i got this HALF JACKET. hahha...super nice with hoodie and it only cost $10.00 from Club Marc.hahaaha. i got a superman shirt too and some cute keychains.

i was rather happy today for the fact that ZQ came out to meet me. Yays. I know u were busy but i still wanted to meet u and u did! thanx cos it simply made my day.

Someone was also msging me throughout making sure that i didnt emo. I know u know how i feel and thanx for trying to keep my spirits up. i still do feel kinda emo though.

thats all i have got for today. nothing else to pen down but still have lots to ponder on.

Good Night world =)

-you raise me up so i can stand on mountains-

shingz

2009-11-07T01:05:00.004+08:00

i tear-ed upon reading those words. i really don't know how i should react. somehow i feel that its my fault. i am kinda at a lost now. what should i do? who can i go to?

-edited-

your words keep running through my head just like a record on repeat. tell me why?

-we've only just begun-

Opening Ceremony

2009-11-06T11:58:00.001+08:00

yes. Yesterday was opening ceremony 2009 and yours truly was the organizer. Guess the outcome. Of course it went well. Haha. ok, gonna do something i did before.

Thank you for Kenn for being the organizer with me.
Thank you Main Comm for supporting my decisions.
Thank you Opening Ceremony Comm for carrying out your duties.
Thank you Instructors for the great performances.
Thank you Emcees for the entertainment. i didnt make the wrong choice.
Thank you Seniors for coming down. Your presence gave us an extra boost.
Thank you Mr Dy for coming down and giving us ur utmost support.
Thank you Students for joining this wonderful family.

theres a lot more for me to thank but thats all for now.

-edited-

{i actually wanted to pen it down but because of the wonderful friends you have, i have decided to be nice. U are one lucky bitch my dear.}

-one in a million, ~~wansin~~ once in a lifetime-

saddening

2009-11-04T19:15:00.002+08:00

DAMN IT. i'm sick. nothing more to say.

-you got a smile that could light this whole town-

its just a facade

2009-11-03T22:17:00.002+08:00

ok. yes this picture looks really colorful and cheerful right. but what is hidden is the faces. this exactly portrays how i feel these couple of days. apparently i look cheerful on the outside but wat people don't really see is the inside. as much as i try to explain, people still insist on their own stand which i can't be bother anymore-really.

well, we are really not good enough and we will never be and we are aware of it. what's the point of making it sound nicer? just let us know and learn it the hard way. not everyone appreciates the kindness and it can really get on the nerves of everyone. Boo to all those who don't care.

2 more days till the alarum bell rings. not that it will really ring but it could be a bell of joy or the bell of a wake up call. i have tried and i want it to work out all so well. if i have done it before i belive i can do it again.

-one in a million-

Great Eastern Womens 10k 2009

2009-11-02T12:42:00.005+08:00

ok. event has just ended. i rode for like almost 20km. and good thing i had the bike unlike the poor sector 2 ic who had to run cos his bike got stolen by some wierd shit. this wierd shit apparently did so much nonsense that we were all pissed wit him. hows that? But i guessed it all went well. i now know the system of planting people(with is rather not efficient) and also how hilly nicoll highway actually can be. i got so much free stuff from the event so yea its cool! haha

ok. next ESG event, i wanna do Drinks!!! haha...and with that i can proudly announce that i know how to do every thing =) yays. ahahah. For now, i am gonna concentrate on STANDARD CHARTER SINGAPORE MARATHON 2009. its like the biggest event for the year. woohoooo =)

more updates soon yea. hi-clubbing recently so don't disturb!

oh ya...wanna thank wansin for having the nice intentionto want to lend me her torch light..so ya...THANKS (she made me do this >.<)

ps. daddy, please dun be so stressed cos soon i will be around =)

-for you i go all the way, gonna take it high-

helping hand

2009-10-31T01:12:00.002+08:00

dont you think these little wire hands look so cute. CREDITS to Wansin. haha.

Thank you for skipping class to meet me.

Thank you for having lunch with me.

Thank you for accompanying me to buy stuff.

Thank you for helping me translate english to dialect.

Thank you for telling me that 184 is a loop bus.

Thank you for helping me explore how to make the door gift.

Thank you for helping me make the door gift.

Thank you for helping me make my laptop Virus-Free.

Thank you for everything.

ps. dun say i never credit you hor

-thanks for all the joy your'e bringing-

boomz boomz

2009-10-28T01:09:00.001+08:00

will be down at zouk tmr night =)

party time, and the floor is going crazy.
party time, and its the ladies night.

-you can come if you want-

colours colours

2009-10-26T15:49:00.004+08:00

my life has been filled with colours lately =) yays.

school has started and what sucks is the grouping. Damn all those who left her in my grp. bloody hell. Well, gonna chiong and improve my gpa. I am gonna get my scholarship.

Events are going good. GE repc has come to an end and GE race day is coming right up. Gonna do really well as sector 1 ic and can move on to other stuff. Now i know how to do a recee and plan the route.

Stand Chart also looking positive, repc manager yo! there is another part of repc which is THE SECRET and well, yea looking forward to it too. My forte and i will do it well =)

Hi! Club is the sex cos i am teaching on 2 days. Cant wait to see my students. Also opening is coming so yea. Got more pereformance this week and opening to follow. Busy week ahead.

ps. mimi is now sitting next to me while i am blogging...whoots >.<

okies...this pretty much sums up wat i have been up to =)

-you cant stop the beat-

yays

2009-10-21T23:19:00.002+08:00

"as happy as the birds flying oh so high in the sky"

ps. somehow the birds form a smiley face just like mine =)

-cos tonights gonna be a good night-

love is in the air

2009-10-20T23:03:00.002+08:00

Love is in the air.

i love holidays.
i love school.
i love my classmates.
i love Hi! Club.
i love my main comms.
i love wayne.
i love HMS.
i love hms peeps.
i love events.
i love volunteers and esg staff.
i love MONEY.

-how much can one love-

bye

2009-10-12T00:23:00.002+08:00

gone. away at camp till thurday. bye bye

-you'll be in my heart-

wheeeeetsss!!!

2009-10-10T20:21:00.002+08:00

haha...super unglam. and this is the shoe pile done by IVAN *winks* and ME!!!

Hi! Club Camp CHECK
Jalan Raya with Hi! Club peeps CHECK
Ladies Night @ Phuture CHECK
SMU event with Hi! Club peeps CHECK
GE Meeting @ esg CHECK
Jalan Raya @ Yeo's place CHECK
Hi! Club Meeting CHECK
GE Volunteer Briefing CHECK

ok. this kinda marked wat i have been up too since i last blogged. had lotsa fun times. i really wanna go into details but u guys are gonna fall asleep so yea. Too bad, not telling u any thing.

ps. and to that friend. i will always be a friend there for you so just call me yea. haha. u know who you are :)

-talk with our hands and listen with our eyes cos actions speak louder than words-

Blah

2009-10-03T01:57:00.002+08:00

"Some bloody Suck-ers just simply pisses me off. Steer clear from the vacuum cleaners."

-bloody hell-

Boo =(

2009-09-29T01:58:00.003+08:00

"if only you weren't so busy, then i wouldn't have to be on hold for so long"

-im waiting for you-

celebration time come on'

2009-09-24T21:21:00.003+08:00

its time to PARTY!!!

Finally. Attachments over. Results are out. Work at Science Centre. Fun Date. Elaine's performance.

Ok. yes. yesterday marked the last day of my attachment. i really really had fun there because it was a completely different setting, colleagues and children. The children were all so cuddly and they are missed. Just 2 days back, one boy whom i was never really closed with ran to me and said "teacher gracia, can you you hold my hand." At that moment, nothing else mattered to me except these kids. I knew i made the right choice in being in this field and this is what i really want. i bought stickers for them on my last day and the smile on their faces was all i wanted to see before i left. i hugged every one of them and whispered into their ears " teacher gracia loves you."

Yes. Reults. Gpa 3.5- i am kinda glad that this is it. but i thought that i could do better. Hopefully the next semester would be as good-looking as the last and that i can continue to excel in my studies. Afterall, this would probably be the second time i really am doing well considering the first to be my o levels. i wanna keep this up. and daddy said something to me when i told him my results. he said "well done. i am very proud of you." Probably the most encouraging thing i have heard =)

Yes. Work was really fun and entertaining. Over 4 days, new friendships were made namely Crystal, ZhenBei, PengHoe, Grace, Nash and Cheryl. They are like making me laugh throught out the days. We even played so much that we ordered Macs over the walkie talkie and i got scolded by daddy for it. RAH. But no matter wat, we still had fun and also with all the yummy food and gossips like miss Boomz. and we also discovered some cool shit at Science Centre. So for those who have not been there for like the last decade, please do drop by for a visit =)

Yes. Fun date. ok. i bought a blue dress and blue shoes with blue eye make-up to follow. haha. sorry darren for making u wait so long. but i believe it was worth the wait. he has never seem me so pretty before and he was like in awe lah. haha. well. dinner was enjoyable. food was good and there was wine =) haha. made friends and took like a dozen photos which i am still waiting for. headed to starbucks@ westmall for drinks. haha. more photos. den he sent me home and presented me with a really really nice bracelet. THANK YOU =)

Yes. Elaine's performance. Wow. She is really good. Got sexy dance. haha... and i really like Hide and Seek. The music, cheoreography and concept was really nice. I had fun cos sitting next to me was Wan Sin and we were having a good laugh through out the whole night. Naiimah, Lai Choon and i shared cost to buy elaine a White Toblerone Bar. I hope u really like it yea. and we took a pic =)

Ok. thats been all thats happening the past week. haha. Looking forward to camp!!! and GE and stand chart. But before i go that far, i am gonna chiong my IP report for submission tmr and i am not even 1/10th into completion. Blah. Whatever. I know i can do it =)

-all that matters is me-

yippie

2009-09-13T12:41:00.002+08:00

friday:

i had IP tutorial which was a waste of time. the only good thing was that it was at 11am so i could wake up late. Den headed down to clear another 3.5hrs of my attachment. Den was abt to leave the centre when Naiimah called and said they got lost. Hurhur, apparently they attempted to fetch me. Lol. We then headed down to Plaza Sing to meet SQ. After walking around, we ended up at Pizza Hut for free pizza. Cool shit lah SQ, always have free stuff. Then we left for orchard. Dropped by Borders for SQ to get a book and we made out way to SWENSENS at Orchard ion. Fucking cool man the place. It is really really damn huge and they ad ICE CREAM BUFFET- free flow man. and there were waffles, fondues, toppings, brownies, cakes, pies and the list goes on. I had like 9 scoops of ice cream and i was damn damn high. U could practically see me grinning from ear to ear. and we all went home Happy=)

Thursday:

Had attachment as usual. Den decided to meet up with my old colleagues. When home to get change and off i went. We were supposed to celebrate Eugene's birthday. In the end, it was Eugene, Doreen, Miss B and me. But, Eugene had to leave for some dinner, Miss B was heading down to Zouk and ta-da, it was just Doreen and I. We we all did have a good chit chat to catch up. And suprisingly, someone is still wearing that watch. Then doreen and i settled for macs and we walked around. We had like a super-uber gossip session. We walked and walked and decided to pop by Shanghai Jazz. Too bad that someone was not there else we would have had some drinks. Turns out that that someone was sick. Headed home and called up that someone, we met and chat till like 5am that morning. Dear Someone "listening to you speak is like hearing angels singing."

Monday:

it was attachment till evening then heading down to kallang to meet up with the SCSM peeps. Yupp, we will be there again this year. We were supposed to meet at 7.30 but some came late so we left at around 8.15 for Sports Council. Mummy and Rendall joined us too. When we were there, the first person i saw was Ben and i was cursing under my breathe already. Registered and we were supposed to choose our roles. I had a freaking difficult time cos i could do most and i didnt really know wat i want. i am flexible and versatile mah. Hur hur. So i settled for REPC counter leader and race day Baggage Manager. Interview went well. Kinda know the results. Den had chit chat session with Roxwell (Daddy), Spectrum(Shuyun) and SSC(melissa)staff. Headed to KFC for dinner. On my way home, after some serious think, i thought that i should probably do something out of my comfort zone. I think i would be able to handle it and it will be good exposure. So called up Shuyun and had my roles changed to REPC Manager and Volunteer Management Manager. So yupp. Gonna have a really busy schedule coming up. Oh, and daddy has got black finger nails. Hurhur

This was what happened the pass few days which were really fruitful and really thoroughly enjoyed myself =) its the hols u know. hahaha. work next week so i hope all goes well.

-its all in the bangs-

fun fun fun

2009-09-06T23:57:00.003+08:00

had hell of a time today.

it was the F1 Singapore Run along marina bay

and i was with the Hi! Club peeps (not that every one was there).

more pics on FB but this is my fav lah...hahaha.

attachment continues tmr

and to spice it up,

mentor is coming down for assesment.

I hope all goes well and

its WATER PLAY tmr so its gonna be really really fun.

after attachment will be heading down to Kallang SSC

for stand chart interview.

omg...this means i will be meeting up with the STAND CHART peeps.

double yays. hahah

-walking on sunshine-

another dream

2009-09-02T19:56:00.005+08:00

Last night while i was sleeping, i dreamt about miss B. i dreamt about you again my dear. In my dream, miss B and i were lying side by side on a tanning bench- not naked thought (if that was what you were thinking). it seemed like we were having fun. We took a dip in the pool nearby still fully clothed. We then locked arms and it turned into a hug. I woke up. I didnt want to let go and i never will if i still have a chance. I could not forget the sight, the vision i saw of us cuddling eachother. I will never ever forget it.

Attachment has begun and its really really good. The kids remember my name and suprisingly they can pronunce it properly. Many many actions to show that they appreciate me. I am already getting my hugs and kisses from majority of the class. Oh, and i have successfully memorised all 23 children's names so a pat on my back for myself. Time seems to fly everyday and i do wish to spend more time with them. My dearest children, you are the light of my life so shine =)

-teacher gracia i love you-

the Proposal

2009-08-30T00:06:00.005+08:00

Hot Stuff!

i had to post 2 pictures cos they look damn good up close and they look even better full body. Look at sandra bullock's body. Nice curves and hot legs. She was like in killer heels through out the whole movie. And and and Ryan Renolds looks damn suave. Hmm...if only such story happens in real life. Wouldn't that just be simply great. Storyline is really good and 2 thumbs-up for it. All u peeps out there, do catch it if u can cos it is really worth the $$$.

-use your vowels-

whatever

2009-08-29T08:54:00.002+08:00

with a Tiara on my head,
i can be on top of the World.

with strong determination,
i can do everything i want.

with no regrets,
i shall leave and let go.

with a little smile on my face,
i will take on the World.

-my balloon flew away-

miss universe 2009

2009-08-25T00:02:00.003+08:00

CONGRATULATIONS Miss Venezuela =)

damn damn hot and venezuela won 2 years in a row.

first time in history.

ladies and gentlemen, take your time to oogle at her.

she has an almost PERFECT body and damn defined facial features.

i spent almost 4 hours watching the repeat again and again and again.

if there was a miss BODY BEAUTIFUL award,

i would have given my vote to MISS PUERTO RICO(sorry cant find nice pics).

Her curves and breast and physique is drop-dead GORGEOUS.

Kays...its officially the HOLIDAYS.

yupp...i shall leave to ponder on what i am gonna do =)

-sweet little lovely lady-

mugging :]

2009-08-24T08:31:00.004+08:00

mugging now

8 more hours to freedom.

Shopping later & i am Eggcited =)

rahhh.just woke up.

Bleah. gonna go school soon.

Dunno if i should go school early to mug with friends

or stay home and probably get distracted.

the former sounds good.

oohhhh..MISS UNIVERSE PAGEANT is at 9am.

i wanna watch!!! ok, got encore telecast tonight.

=)haha

-sweet lovely lady-

i'm ok now

2009-08-20T01:11:00.002+08:00

things have more or less kinda blow over.

new friendship are forged again (i hope, unless ppl are still fake)

well, made up my mind for some stuff.

i think it will do me some good.

daddy has been a great great help.

i cant think of how i can ever thank him.

after so much that has happen, he is still there.

i really wanna apologise for all the trouble.

i guess i owe him a favour.

studying has been going well.

i wanna clear this round of exams really well.

this is what i want and i will strive for it =)

and attachment is nearing and i am excited.

Gonna turn in now.

Goodnight world.

-if only i have you-

wtf went wrong

2009-08-17T15:32:00.001+08:00

fuck off.

you just pissed me off.

you can fucking eat shit and die you bloody asshole.

the middle finger is for you.

-what the fuck is wrong-

celebrations time COME ON

2009-08-15T23:57:00.002+08:00

omg. this group of wonderful people gave me a surprise that i did not expect lah. i though that it was just a normal shopping day with naiimah. apparrently i asked kenneth to join us but he said that he had basketball. it was all a lie lah. naiimah and i were shopping around bugis den we decided to go to TOM'S PALETTE for ice cream. and while i was happily enjoying my ice cream, TA-DA, they appeared. i was so damn surprised lah can. haha. Den we headed to SWENSENS for dinner. and hani ask me to accompany her to the toilet. and when we came back, there was a CAKE. hahah ICE CREAM cake lei. COOKIES N' CREAM ice cream cake. hahaha. well, somehow or rather Khairul was with his frens at swensens too. he offered to get me an ice cream but i declined cos i was so damn full already. and he got me TWISTIES (as what he promised) and chocolate instead. Lol right. anyway main comm dearies got me a really really cute little bear which says I LOVE YOU and naiimah got me a freaking BIG BALLOON and made me shop around bugis with it. Lol.

yesterday, friday dinner dates gave me a surprise too. they got me a cake and a card. thank u all and thank u wan ru for organising =) haha OH and thanx ah naiimah for smashing the whipped cream on my hair and face. hahaha...

ok...these 2 days have been really fun and i wanna thank all that have wished me, gave me pressies and also organise the SURPRISES for me. i really really appreciate the effort and i really enjoyed myself. i will remember this day and that it will be etched in my for as long as i live (considering the fact that my STM doesnt set in..hurhur). i just wanna wish u guys all the best in ur up-coming exams and may u guys do well in watever you wanna do in future =)

-there is someone smiling at you-

i am 18 =)

2009-08-14T00:42:00.002+08:00

happy birthday to me

happy birthday to me-e

happy birthday to me =)

i am 18. wow

-i am glad you remembered-

bangs baby bangs

2009-08-13T20:02:00.003+08:00

i have got BANGS!!!
whoots
new hair to invite in the new year =)

the bangs were kinda unintentional.
i rebonded my hair and got the guy who cut.
he told me that bangs will not be nice but the next thing i knew,
he chopped my fringe. Lol.
Kie Wu and Izzati and Lina says its nice.
Naiimah and Hani says it ugly.
But i like it and i have to live with it so yea.

bangs baby bangs =)

-its all in the fringe-

hi! club

2009-08-11T00:08:00.001+08:00

i LOVE my MAIN COMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-unstoppable signing-

NDP!!!

2009-08-09T23:12:00.003+08:00

it was just in Febuary when i mentioned that i was looking forward to NDP.
in a blink of an eye, it has come and now it over.
long gone were the days when i tried to imitate jean danker and the rest.

look at how smart and amazing the colours party is.
i have always been in awe of them.
these men are the uniformed men who stands tall and proud.
they are role models for all men YEA....

hahaha....hectic days have passed.
Closing ceremony has passed and WOOHOO!!!
it was a blast.
emotions were running high but we got over it as a Hi! Club- a family =)
and all my main comm peeps + wayne... I LOVE U GUYS!!!!

sad that i have just ended another chapter of my love life.
but it also means that i am gonna embark on a new one.
every other chater makes me stronger and better...
well... at least the air was cleared and our minds are at peace =)

anyway its already the HOLIDAYS for me.
i just need to clear 2 exam papers in another 15 days time.
and i am so looking forward to attchment.
new environment, new colleagues, new children, new mentors.
so much new things to learn.

with this i am gonna spend the rest of my night submerging in the remaining happy atmosphere of NDP before it comes to an end at midnight =)

-come together-

bye bye bye

2009-08-08T21:54:00.007+08:00

Bye Bye Bye

Bye, Bye, ByeBye, Bye...Bye, Bye...

Oh, Oh..I'm doin' this tonight,

You're probably gonna start a fight.

I know this can't be right.

Hey baby come on,

I loved you endlessly,

When you weren't there for me.

So now it's time to leave and make it alone

I know that I can't take no more

It ain't no lie

I wanna see you out that door

Baby, bye, bye, bye...Bye Bye

Don't wanna be a fool for you

Just another player in your game for two

You may hate me but it ain't no lie,

Baby, bye, bye, bye...Bye Bye

Don't really wanna make it tough,

I just wanna tell you that I had enough.
It might sound crazy,But it ain't no lie,

Baby, bye, bye, bye

Just hit me with the truth,

Now, girl you're more than welcome to.

So give me one good reason,

Baby come on

I live for you and me,

And now I really come to see,

That life would be much better once you're gone.

I know that I can't take no more

It ain't no lie,I wanna see you out that door

Baby, bye, bye, bye...Bye Bye

Don't wanna be a fool for you

Just another player in your game for two

You may hate me but it ain't no lie,

Baby Bye, bye, bye...Bye Bye

Don't really wanna make it tough,

I just wanna tell you that I had enough

It might sound crazy,But it ain't no lie,

Baby, bye, bye, bye

I'm giving up I know for sure

I don't wanna be the reason for your love no more

Bye Bye

I'm checkin' outI'm signin' off

Don't wanna be the loser and I've had enough

Don't wanna be your fool

In this game for two

So I'm leavin' you behind

Bye, bye, bye...

I don't wanna make it tough

But I had enough

And it ain't no lie

Bye, bye baby

Bye, Bye

Don't wanna be a fool for you

Just another player in your game for two

(I don't wanna be your fool)

But it ain't no lie

Baby bye, bye, bye...

Don't really wanna make it tough

I just wanna tell you that I had enough

Might sound crazy,But it ain't no lie,
Bye, bye, bye

-i just dont love u no more-

oh my Josh

2009-08-05T22:45:00.003+08:00

it would be really nice if we could share this song together.

i dont wanna miss a thing

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
While youre far away dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Every moment spent with you is a moment I treasure

Dont want to close my eyes
I dont want to fall asleep
Cause Id miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing
Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
Id still miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing

Lying close to you feeling your heart beating
And Im wondering what youre dreaming
Wondering if its me youre seeing
Then I kiss your eyes
And thank God were together
I just want to stay with you in this moment forever
Forever and ever

Dont want to close my eyes
I dont want to fall asleep
Cause Id miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing
Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
Id still miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing

I dont want to miss one smile
I dont want to miss one kiss
I just want to be with you
Right here with you, just like this
I just want to hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And just stay here in this moment
For all the rest of time

Dont want to close my eyes
I dont want to fall asleep
Cause Id miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing
Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
Id still miss you baby
And I dont want to miss a thing
Dont want to close my eyes
I dont want to fall asleep
I dont want to miss a thing

-i really dont wanna miss a thing-

yumyum

2009-08-05T00:40:00.002+08:00

i cant wait for 4.30pm to arrive.
i cant wait to have ice cream.
i cant wait to see someone.
i cant wait to be with someone.
i cant wait to have ice cream with someone.

Ice cream is really nice and i am like craving for it. But what can make it even nicer is the special someone that you are gonna share it with. I hope i am special to you just as much as you are special to me.

-my cutie pie-

cutie pie

2009-08-01T00:47:00.002+08:00

this cute little boy is really damn cute lah.

haha...he is trying toact serious in this peek but u should see him when he smiles

like super cute little boy. Ho ho

he was my boyfren for the night =)

we kinda had some fun. hahaha

oh...we also shared a mcflurry.

and this little cute boy told random ppl that we were tgt. Lol

kays.. rehearsal went well.

sec 1s just cleared part 1 of FDC format. Part 2 and 3 to go.

i hope everything can be covered and that is all i ask for.

parade is nearing.

i am looking forward to it but somehow i dont wan it to come to quickly

i still wanna spend time with sq, clarence, gary and the kids...esp JOSH *giggles*

things are happening so quickly that they come and go >.<

-cheerios-

2009-07-29T23:46:00.004+08:00

lovely classmates of mine.

anyway 2 modules down and 3 more to go.

really excited as i am nearing all my events namely

-BBSS opening ceremony

-Hi! Club closing ceremony

-outing with ex-collegues

-National Day

-my Birthday

-exam

-attachment

-driving

-Hi! Club camp

how can i not be excited about these important events thats gonna play a part in my life be it as a memory or a learning experience. well, recently been opening up more to some friends. i guess thats good. have been quite emo lately and its good that i am moving away from it. i dunno why but ...OMG I JUST SAW MYSELF ON TV...Like finally.hahahha...ok back to the point..hahaha i dunno why but i feel so motivated to do what i need to do and its good =).

toddles for now. really alot for me to do and learn so i am gonna gear up for all the action. peace out

-i got the whole world in my hands-

2009-07-25T00:12:00.001+08:00

you are my sunshine

my only sunshine

you make me happy

when skies are grey

you never know dear

how much i love you

please dont take

my sunshine away =)

i really wanna tell you this but we are just not meant to be.

thanx for nothing.

-im coming-

my mom =)

2009-07-23T16:56:00.002+08:00

this is my mummy. many many years back.
i bet u guys are damn jealous >.<

these days have been pretty hectic.
i have been trying to catch my breath one assignment after another.
There is like 4 more and we are done =)
so glad for the people around me for their support.
i love my mummy the most for $$$ and chicken essence.
hahaha.i seriously think that i have the hottest mum in town lah.

hahhaha...hi club starting soon and i am so glad abt it =)

-signing my way thru-

2009-07-19T14:57:00.003+08:00

Went for NE Show2 yesterday with the above dearies.

Kinda enjoyed the show. They adapted a different concept with lots of miss and match and remix. I am most in love with the parade and ceremony. The colour party so damn Hot. i swear i wanna see them again hopefully every year. And saw xiaxue. She was watching the same parade as me. hahahha.

Before we headed down to marina bay, we had external performance rehearsal. it went quite well except for someone who came late. We could have ended at 4 but becaose of u we had to leave at 5, thanx. now everyone knows the formation. all that is left is brushing up and memorising the lyrics. Hopefully all goes well for this wednesday's rehearsal and we are ready for the performance. Its at Tampines Mall on the 25 Juy a saturday. there are 2 slots, 2.50-3.00 pm and 3.50- 4.00 pm. So all u people out there, if u are free do come and support ok.

and before the performace rehearsal, we had BBSS OPENING CEREMONY REHEARSAL. hhahaha..i totally enjoy my time there. i sacrifice days of my week to go down for training but its all worthwhile. the company there is great so everything is kinda enjoyable. my cadets damn cute. the ask me why Zhen Lin pespire so much like raing like that? and i said " ho am i suppose to answer that qn" hahhahha. but he really perspire damn alot. Just like weiting. training haven start already shirt wet le. hahaha.

i am hoping for a new love now. hahhahaa. Hmm...dunno who yet but wait and see. Hmm but coming to think of it i am always left single. Lol haha. maybe its jaut not my time yet =)

-care for a friend? have a fisherman's friend-

love my life =)

2009-07-08T23:46:00.003+08:00

this is the hi club main comm 2009.
from left: Lina, Izzati, Kenn, me, Sean, Naiimah, Kenneth
absent: ezekiel, hani

these people make school the best place on earth.

i Love Lina for her smses and encouragments.
i Love Izzati for being really cute and cheerful.
i Love Kenn for being really fun and entertaining.
i Love Sean for being a really nice guy.
i Love Naiimah for being my soulmate. Nothing can match up to you.
i Love Kenneth for being so gentlemanly and funny.
i Love Ezekiel for being such a nice partner and does everything my way.
i Love Hanni for being really cheerful and happy all the time.
not forgetting
i Love WAYNE who has been a damn great instructor. Its makes life much easier for me =)

as much as the going gets tough, the tough gets going. as much as i am emoing, i am happy. different people really makes you express differently. i wish i could express myself to everyone else like how i do to my dearest Hi! Club besties. these people are not only my committe members but they are dear friends to me-almost like a family. At least when everything else is in darkness, this little light of Hi! Club is shining =)

-let the sun illuminate what cannot be found-

2009-07-07T13:58:00.002+08:00

i wanna shut my eyes so tight

and open my mouth so wide

and SCREAM...

Rahhhhhhhhhhh

i dunno if its me or the people around me but i have been feeling so damn vexed for the past week. I dont lunch tgt with the people i used to anymore. I rather be alone doing my own damn things and this is not good. But no one actually notice, bothers or cares. And i am so guilty of venting my anger on someone else. Blah. i am fucking pissed. What the hell is wrong. Good heavens. Is it me being moody or is it really no one cares anymore till the stage that i dont bother anymore. Everyone is so clique-ish and there is always no room for me. i dont really care about attention or whatever shit but my presence is getting more and more non-existent. Guess all efforts to pull everyone tgt has gone down the drain and everyone doesnt need me anymore now that they have found their own besties. Above all everyone is damn fake now. i really cant trust anyone anymore now. i shall just have to keep mum and swallow everything. at least i wont get hurt in the course of work. it also can get pissing when people are free loaders and get protected just because she is pretty/rich /cute wat ever the fuck it is. seriously i have been doing the whole freaking thing myself and i dont even make a noise. just when i bloody didnt come for one session and u did that session doesnt mean i am not doing anything. the number of stuff i have done is countless as compared to the couple of pieces u did. fuck. fuck my life.

i want to go out. i want to the people i love. i want to have Hi!Club everyday. i want a boyfriend/girlfriend. i fucking want some peace. it sucks to be sad everyday and gracia doesnt like to be sad. Eat shit and die to all those bloody people around me.

-screw my life-

allswell

2009-06-30T16:21:00.004+08:00

Right. Alls Well =)

Thank you Eric for coming over to say hi.
Thank you Classmates for helping me throughout my sleepless nights.
Thank you Kenneth for playing Bumper Stars with me.
Thank you Justine for being a great girlfriend.
Thank you Wayne for being a great partner and for listening to my woes.
Thank you Zhong Qi for chilling with me and advicing me with my problems.
Thank you Bernice for caring for me like a little sister.
Thank you Jason for being a great Daddy and a great support in my life.
Thank you Bianca for being a great Mummy and a great advisor in my life.
Thank you SCSM peeps for the great experience and the wonderful kinship.
Thank you Khairul for poking fun at me all the time and making me laugh.
Thank you Fazli for making me feel like i am really the next Singapore Idol.
Thank you SI peeps for being there and supporting me.
Thank you Hi! Club for making my life meaningful.
Thank you Kie Wu and BFS peeps for having me around.
Thank you Naiimah for being my soulmate and that pretty much covers eveything in my life.
oh. how could i forget.
and Special Thanx to Feng Kai for giving me shit.

Well...i have said my greatest thanks and i am really grateful to everyone of you guys =)

-thanksgiving day-

a day out

2009-06-27T23:17:00.002+08:00

woohoooo.
hi club outing to Sentosa.
had a lot of fun.
its been quite a while since i have worked out.
did have a good sweat out.
really relaxing and having heart to heart talks with my peeps.
also had many many fun gossiping. hahaha.

the previous day went to support kenneth, ryan and friends for basketball match.
it was a fellowship thingy and geylang.
so far but it is always worthwhile
hahaha.
they did well so kudos too them=)

its been quite a blast these few days.
chilled today with my dearies naiimah and kenneth.
sometimes just spending time with great company just makes ur day.
even just having lunch, walking around and having ice cream seems incredible.
cheers =)

-iluminate the words-